Taking a stay at home life for granted


I am not perfect and there are days where I am tired and the sound of the kids running through the house playing makes me want to scream, “STOP!” But, I don’t.  Instead, I stop and think. I remind myself that I am going to miss this very, very soon. At 9 and 13, my children are over halfway gone. My eyes swell at the thought. I can’t imagine my life without them.

The Husband and I had to sacrifice a lot for me to be able to stay home. I could have easily returned to work and we would have had more money. In financially stressful moments, I have questioned our decision. Then I look at what we have instead of what we are missing. Money couldn’t buy the childhood that my children have had. Money couldn’t replace the bond. . .the closeness of our relationship. Money could never have created the incredible people they are becoming. There isn’t an amount of money in this world that could replace all the “firsts” I have been a part of.  And no job or money could give me this feeling I have when I think of it all.

I consider myself one of the lucky ones. I know a lot of Moms that would love to stay home with their children and don’t have the opportunity. Sometimes it is hard for me not to comment when someone tells me that they just can’t wait for school to start or for their kids to go to camp. I don’t think they realize that their children can feel their *want* too.

I could turn this into a very long column about how important it is to be involved whether you work or stay at home and how your children are so much more than a “responsibility”, but I won’t. I will not make this a “Working Mom vs. SAHM” column. I completely respect those who choose to work. I think it is a very personal decision and cannot be judged by anyone.

My point is that there are so many Mom’s that choose to stay home and don’t appreciate what they have. They are taking it all for granted. Instead of hearing the kids running through the house and smile knowing they are having fun, the scold their children for making so much noise. There are so many women that would happily take their place.

None of us are perfect. I make mistakes as a parent and my “woulda coulda shoulda” list has been long at times. But, I will tell you I love my children more than anything in this world. They are my priority. I take full responsibility for who they are and who they will become.

Whether you are a working parent or you stay at home, I hope that the next time you are feeling tired and your children are loud, but are just having fun, you smile. I hope when they come over to you for the billionth time to “show you something” and want you to get up after sitting down for the first time in hours, you jump at the opportunity. And I hope that you will never take for granted the fullness of your life and all its incredible chaos. This is not forever. One day they will be gone and the house will be quiet. You may just miss all that *noise*.

7 thoughts on “Taking a stay at home life for granted

  1. Karin ~ Thank you so much for writing. It’s incredible and insightful to read someones else’s thoughts and even more so from another part of our world. I completely agree with you. Life is never just black or white.

    Warmest Regards,

    Marie

  2. I read your blog on the other side of the world, in Sweden in Northern Europe. And I want to thank you for giving me a view into your perspetive, that in so many ways are totally different from mine. There is one thing we agree on and that is that life is not black or white.
    Warm greetings
    /Karin

  3. Excellent post….with homeschooling my four boys…SAHM doesn’t even cover it…but I’d rather have those days of fun even though the house isn’t spotless…because I do know that they grow fast and life is precious!! I have four! Children are such a blessing and it bugs me to the moon and back—that our society, today, devalues life/children. I, for one, know that they are a blessing from above. 😉 Thanks again.

  4. Thanks Camila. 🙂 Working and having children is a full time job. I worked two jobs and went to school as a single parent before meeting my husband. IMO, staying home and raising my children has been more challenging. But, that is just my experience. I think it depends on the situation, the family, the children’s needs, and the support from others. I just can’t understand how people compare and try to say one is harder than the other. I speak only from my own experience. I would never tell anyone that they are wrong or that they are just a stay at home mom. I hope people can see both views and take something from it and not judge, instead educate themselves and go back to the focus of my post which is to be grateful for what you have and not take it for granted. 🙂

    My children are getting older, but I feel it’s even more important now to be here than when they were little. I fill my school days with volunteering for local non-profits and creating my own company along with writing (of course ;)). My husband and I decided that I would not go to work full or part time because it was important to us for me to be home before and after school and through the summer. I’m not taking anything for granted and I know it will soon be over. 😦 I do know a lot of women that return to work once their kids are school age. I think it’s great. It’s all about balance and every home needs it, but only that family will know what is right for them. Maybe this will start some positive conversations not only among the people commenting, but in the homes between parents. 🙂

  5. Thank you so much for this!!!!!!! I have been a SAHM for the last 5 1/2 yrs and at times I did beat myself up for not doing enough. Specially when faced with the “So what do you do? Oh, you don’t work…” type of conversations… Most of my friends are successful career women and moms, and there are days that I wish I had a career too. But then I see my daughter and realize it’s all worth it – even if we can’t take trips every year! Now that she just started Kindergarten, I am still trying to adapt to the quiet house :))

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